(Honorable Delegate Mark G and the free-riding Heath)

Our last night in Poland went off with a bang. There we were minding our business free-riding the tram when… bang an undercover transport officer whipped out a badge and asked us for our tickets. “Tickets? what tickets?”
We tried to blag our way out of it, but he wasn’t having any of it. In all honesty, we’d been too damned lazy to find out where to buy the tickets, but lets face it that’s not really an excuse and now we had this dodgy undercover transport officer waving some cheap looking ID in our faces asking us about our tickets.

Doug tried to explain that we didn’t know where to buy the tickets, but it was not an acceptable excuse and he understandably didn’t buy it. Instead, we all got off the tram. We pleaded being stupid foreigners, and that we were leaving the country on the same day, but it fell on deaf ears (he’d probably heard it all a million times before). He explained with the casuality of a pro (and despite being suspect on his ID, we noticed a Pole had also been escorted off by another officer):
“So, you should each pay 100 fine, I only make money by catching people, so what should I do?”
Doug suggested hopefully: “You could let us go with a warning and we’ll promise not to do it again?”
“Nah, can’t do that. But maybe, instead of me giving you 2 * 100 tickets, maybe you could pay me 100 between you and I didn’t see you and you didn’t see me”. In over 10,000km of travelling, we were in our first bribe situation!

Faced with a 200 bill between us, or a 100 bribe, we did the immoral thing. We were lead up an alley to ‘be out of site of the public’ and palmed him a note. Then, we were free to go, sadly with only a few dollars left (the bribe had been the money we were going to buy some food with).

An overnight train later, including an experience sharing our carriage with some smelly homeless-looking guys (the stench was so bad, you could smell it even after they’d got out) and 2 very friendly Polish students (the most friendly people we’d met in Poland), we made it into Prague, Czech Republic.

As time is ticking, the energy is draining from our travelling, but I think also the cost difference is reminding us of the difference between Europe and Asia. Still, from here we are planning some last charity actions, and will be heading via Germany to Paris before our arrival in London.

All, remember the Tuxedo Travels Finale Party in central London:
August 18th
On Anon, Piccadilly Circus.
Contact us for details if you need to!